Bisexuality is one of the most misunderstood identities within the LGBTQ+ spectrum. Despite being a valid and recognised sexual orientation, bisexuality is often met with myths, stereotypes, and even erasure from both straight and queer communities. So let’s set the record straight (or, rather, not-so-straight) about what bisexuality really is—and what it isn’t.
What Is Bisexuality?
At its core, bisexuality is the attraction to more than one gender. It does not necessarily mean equal attraction to all genders, nor does it dictate how someone experiences or expresses their sexuality. The Bisexual Manifesto, published in 1990, made it clear: bisexuality is about attraction beyond the gender binary and is not limited to just “men and women.”
The most widely accepted definition today comes from activist Robyn Ochs, who describes bisexuality as:
“The potential to be attracted—romantically and/or sexually—to people of more than one gender, not necessarily at the same time, not necessarily in the same way, and not necessarily to the same degree.”
This definition highlights the fluidity and individuality of bisexual attraction.
What Bisexuality Is NOT:
1. Bisexuality is not “just a phase.”
Many people mistakenly assume that bisexuality is a temporary identity on the way to being either straight or gay. This is not the case. Bisexuality is a legitimate and stable orientation for those who identify as such, regardless of past or future relationships.
2. Bisexuality is not 50/50 attraction.
A common misconception is that bisexuals must be equally attracted to men and women (or multiple genders) in a perfectly balanced way. In reality, attraction varies from person to person—some bisexuals may have strong preferences, while others are more fluid in their attractions.
3. Bisexuality is not the same as polyamory.
Being bisexual means being attracted to multiple genders, while polyamory refers to having multiple romantic or sexual relationships at the same time. A bisexual person can be monogamous, just as a straight or gay person can be polyamorous.
4. Bisexuality does not reinforce the gender binary.
Some people believe that the term "bisexual" suggests there are only two genders, but that’s not true. Many bisexuals are attracted to people of all gender identities, including non-binary and genderqueer individuals.
5. Bisexuality is not about being confused or indecisive.
Bisexual people know who they are. Just because they are attracted to multiple genders doesn’t mean they are unsure of their orientation. Attraction is complex and doesn't have to fit into rigid categories.
Why Bisexual Visibility Matters
Bisexual individuals face higher rates of mental health struggles, discrimination, and erasure than their gay and lesbian counterparts. Many feel excluded from both straight and LGBTQ+ spaces, leading to what’s called “double discrimination.”
By talking openly about bisexuality, challenging myths, and creating spaces for bi people to connect, we can work toward a world where bisexuality is fully recognised, respected, and celebrated.
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At Bi & Beyond, we believe in embracing bisexuality without limits. That’s why we’re creating spaces where bisexuality isn’t questioned—it’s honoured. Whether you’re newly exploring your identity or have been out for years, our events and community offer a place to connect, celebrate, and just be you. The next event is Fri 25th April, grab your ticket here: https://www.spicymatch.com/events/55148/
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💜 Ready to experience bisexuality without boundaries? Join us for our Bi & Beyond team and SpicyMatch for Bi-to-Cap holiday in Cap d’Agde—a space where being bi is the norm, not the exception. Learn more: https://www.spicymatch.com/events/50704/.